I just can't read another food/cooking/recipe/chef blog. Don't get me wrong...some of are incredibly well-written, informative and entertaining. And written and photographed by some darn talented people who are my friends. But, seriously...I just can't keep up with the 82,475 of them I try to follow. My eyes are bloodshot, and I just can't take another recipe for cauliflower panna cotta. Or pictures of a single seared sea scallop balanced on a perfectly cut square of house made flatbread, piled high with chiffonade of organic moss from the underside of fiddle ferns and dusted with wasp pollen. I just can't. I mostly just eat three ordinary meals a day, and there's no way in hell I'll ever cook, bake, poach, fry, grill, preserve, truss, whip, beat, or roast 1/1000th of those recipes. Ever.
So let's try this idea, based on my abiding love for Dear Abby and starting trouble. Questions. About anything at all. Could be food related, or perhaps you'd like a bit of insight into your jackass boyfriend who takes money out of your purse....those are fun questions. Or, perhaps your mother-in-law is a smidge of pain in the ass. Yes, we can discuss cooking...but it has to be....interesting. Like, why did that jar of pickled eggs explode in the refrigerator? Or, how do you get duck pate out of your hair? Or, best of all, let's discuss....recipe contests. Ah, now I have your attention, because most of you reading this are probably the diligent and willing participants (as I am) in this sponsor driven psychological hobby from hell. Because you know and I know...we love to yammer on about what's going on, real or imagined, in the cooking contest world.
Or we could discuss your mother-in-law. Your call.
So send me questions or opinions and I'll write up the best of them. Or I'll just make stuff up and we'll go from there.
I'm already having fun and it didn't involve 15 pictures of water boiling!
5 comments:
So . . . if you could kill and cook ANYTHING, what would be your most desirable meat-centric meal? You have to kill it yourself and tell me how you would cook it.
If I had to "kill" it myself, it would most likely be vegetarian, whatever it was. Oh, don't misunderstand...I eat meat and sport leather. (otherwise I'd BE a vegan I guess) I just don't want to have to look at it moving around first. The only thing from the "fauna" list would be big, hairy spider. I can't stand spiders. So the recipe?....
1. Find a big spider, preferably a male (they're smaller, but easier to catch)
2. Carefully step on it wearing houseslippers, so as not to damage the carcass too badly.
3. Soak it in salt water not only to season it, but to remove any innards that may have been displaced.
4. Remove all prickly hairs from it's legs and backsides with tweezers (as a Brazilian Wax seems like overkill)
5. Melt butter in small (VERY small) skillet and saute spider lightly.
6. Remove with slotted spoon, drain on paper towels and cool.
7. Melt good quality chocolate in double boiler, and drizzle thoroughly over spider.
8. Enjoy with a nice, HUGE, glass of Cabernet!
CATHERINE !!!
Yea. That was a TEST POST. It worked !!! Now how do I "follow"?
Amen Sister! So cute.
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